{"id":4716,"date":"2017-10-17T18:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-10-17T22:00:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2020-09-12T15:13:00","modified_gmt":"2020-09-12T19:13:00","slug":"so-your-character-is-hard-of-hearing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/victoriagracehowell.com\/staging\/6258\/so-your-character-is-hard-of-hearing\/","title":{"rendered":"So Your Character is Hard of Hearing … Featuring Lelia Rose Foreman + Kiara @ Bookends"},"content":{"rendered":"


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<\/span> When I was a kid and in my early teens, my piano teacher was actually deaf. A lot of people think that’s an impossibility, but she could see the keys and feel the vibrations of the piano. Since then I’ve felt a connection to deaf and hard of hearing culture. I even took a semester of sign language in high school and whenever I see my piano teacher I sign to her. Whenever I see a deaf character in a show or movie I have good memories of my piano teacher. Some of my favorites are Emmett Bledsoe from Switched at Birth<\/i> and Cass from Doctor Who<\/i>. I’m really happy to have Lelia on the blog to give us some firsthand incite on being hard of hearing!<\/span><\/p>\n

Let’s welcome Lelia!<\/span>
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(Images aren’t mine) <\/span>
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Hi. I\u2019m Lelia Rose Foreman. While following my Air Force Pediatric Husband around the world, I raised and released five children. I garden and make stuff. My favorite achievement was introducing a new crop to some Rwandan farmers. I also write science fiction and am collaborating on a YA science fantasy series with my oldest son, a video game artist.<\/span>
\nBlog<\/a>\/\/Facebook<\/a>\/\/Twitter<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

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Kiara Kalmey is a young writer, ENFP, and dog lover, among other things. She has been wearing hearing aids since 2012 and is a firm advocate for the accurate representation of mental and physical disabilities in fiction. You can probably find her watching the latest Marvel movie, rereading Harry Potter for the umpteenth time, or over-analyzing the plots of books, movies, and TV shows.<\/span>
\nBlog<\/a>\/\/Twitter<\/a><\/span>
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<\/b><\/span> How does being hard of hearing physically feel? How do you think it compares to those who aren\u2019t hard of hearing?<\/b><\/span>
\nLelia:<\/b> There is no physical feeling particular to being hard of hearing. Before the cochlear implant, I did have a lot of tinnitus. For me, the sound was the pleasant drone of a far-off chainsaw which has positive connotations for me. In the morning I would fit a chorus or hymn to the dominant note of the sound and let the earworm carry me through the day. Some people have nasty tinnitus. Mine was okay.<\/span>
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<\/span> When I became functionally deaf, I had my hearing tested yet again for a referral to a surgeon. I was disappointed to find that after the surgery I would still need to wear an outside appliance with a magnet that attaches to the magnet that has been drilled into my skull. Still better than the hearing aids that formed pressure sores in my ear canals. <\/span>
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<\/span> Have you seen the videos of people hearing for the first time and they\u2019re so delighted! Not my experience.<\/span>
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<\/span> I cried for six weeks after the surgery because the appliance shouted static at me all day long. All I could hear was static. I had been given a DVD with exercises to practice hearing. For instance, there would be a drum sound, and then a flute sound, and I would need to click on the picture of what was making the sound. I could not tell the difference. Each sound was just louder static I could not tell the difference between a cat and a cow.  <\/span>I practiced hours every day and still, all I could hear was static. <\/span>
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<\/span> Six weeks later, as I was driving, I heard the turn signal. Not the first <\/span>sound I would have picked to hear, but I heard it. It used to drive my kids nuts that I could not hear when I left the blinker on. So.a sound. The next day I started to hear the difference between a drum and a flute. And every day I could hear more. After six months I could carry on conversations in quiet rooms. I still have problems in noisy rooms and music <\/span>mostly blares to me, but now people will talk to me. I can hear the radio. I can hear sermons. I feel like I have re-entered society.<\/span>
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<\/span> Kiara:<\/b> <\/span>For me, I don\u2019t particularly feel<\/i> different physically due to my hearing loss, but depending on the kind of hearing loss, others might have side effects.<\/span>
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<\/span> My hearing loss was present from birth. However, it wasn\u2019t noticed or diagnosed until I was a month or so away from turning thirteen. Through several rounds of hearing tests and then a CAT scan, I discovered I have a condition called Enlarged Vestibular Aqueduct Syndrome (LVAS or EVA for short). Basically, that means that the tube that connects my inner ear and my skull is larger than normal (mine is about double the size it should be), and for reasons the doctors aren\u2019t entirely sure of yet, that causes hearing loss. The condition cannot be cured with surgery, and so I wear hearing aids in both ears. The severity of my hearing loss is considered mild to moderate; there\u2019s a high chance I will lose more hearing as time goes on, but thankfully that hasn\u2019t happened yet. <\/span>
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<\/span> There are two main kinds of hearing loss: conductive and sensorineural. Conductive hearing loss usually affects structures in the outer ear, whereas sensorineural hearing loss affects the inner ear and the nerves. Those with sensorineural hearing loss might feel physical differences, such as dizziness, tinnitus (ringing in the ears), and a loss of balance. As for me, my hearing loss is a mixture of both conductive and sensorineural. I haven\u2019t dealt with the physical side effects that others with sensorineural hearing loss have felt, other than some tinnitus now and again. I\u2019d like to blame my clumsiness on the sensorineural part of my hearing loss, but I\u2019m not sure that I can. \ud83d\ude1b <\/span>
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<\/span> So yeah, the hearing loss itself doesn\u2019t really make me feel any different. Sometimes when I have my hearing aids out, it feels like stuff is muffled, but that\u2019s really it. <\/span>
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<\/span> As for wearing hearing aids, they do feel different for a while when you first start to wear them. It\u2019s more of a tickling sensation, a reminder that your ear isn\u2019t used to something being stuck in it. Once you\u2019ve worn your hearing aids for several months, that feeling will die down. I\u2019ve been wearing hearing aids for about five years now, and I can\u2019t even feel them when I have them in! It\u2019s similar to getting used to wearing glasses or contacts.<\/span><\/p>\n

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How do you feel about being hard of hearing?<\/b>
\nLelia: <\/b>It\u2019s a dreadful nuisance and isolating.<\/span>
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<\/span> Kiara: <\/b>It can be difficult sometimes, but I love being hard-of-hearing and wouldn\u2019t change it. That may sound weird, but it\u2019s a part of me, and I accept it. I\u2019m proud that being hard-of-hearing places me in a community that I wouldn\u2019t be able to access to as a fully hearing person. <\/span>
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<\/span> What challenges does being hard of hearing pose?<\/b><\/span>
\nLelia: <\/b>The dreadful isolation is the worst. Only one friend in my decades of being hard of hearing would sit by me during conversations and every few minutes would turn to me and give me a one-sentence summary of what was being talked about. My husband would take notes on a computer during sermons and I would then be able to follow the sermon at least somewhat.<\/span>
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<\/span> Also irritating was the need to buy new hearing aids every few years for thousands of dollars each. That was a drain on the budget.<\/span>
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<\/span> Kiara:<\/b> <\/span>Being hard-of-hearing affects communication more than anything else. I\u2019m constantly facing challenges in any communication-based environment: work, school, friend groups, church, etc. <\/span>
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<\/span> As someone who is hard-of-hearing, I have to work extra hard to keep up with conversations. People seem to think that wearing hearing aids restores my hearing to normal, but they don\u2019t. They just amplify sounds, which definitely helps, but they don\u2019t make sounds clearer. I remember seeing one hard-of-hearing blogger describe hearing loss as a game of Wheel of Fortune. You catch some pieces of words or conversations and have to use those to figure out what you didn\u2019t hear. That\u2019s a good way to explain it, because that\u2019s what I do a lot. Sure, sometimes I might not hear you at all, but often I\u2019ll hear part of what someone has said and am able to figure out the rest using context clues. For example, let\u2019s say you and I were talking about your dog. If you said something like \u201cMy dog really loves w___\u201d, and all I hear is the W sound and not the whole word, I might guess that you said \u201cwalks\u201d. Sometimes I guess wrong and sometimes I guess right, but it\u2019s all about trying to figure it out. Of course, sometimes I can\u2019t figure it out and just have to ask the person to repeat themselves. <\/span>
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<\/span> Here are some specific challenges that stand out to me:<\/span><\/p>\n